1. |
Okay, Alright.
02:17
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It's okay, it's alright. It's not anyone's fault.
Especially not-
If you asked me what, what I did today
I would not tell you the truth.
'Cause I laid on the floor, listened to "tick tock"
as my day slipped away from me.
It's okay, it's alright. It's not anyone's fault
Especially not mine.
So go ahead and ask me what I did today.
Let me lie to your face.
I'll tell you about how, how I'm over it now.
And that I don't care, I don't care, I don't care.
It's okay, it's alright. It's not anyone's fault
Especially not mine.
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2. |
Untied
02:12
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Every email you send me gives me such mixed feelings.
I wanna laugh, I wanna cry.
I wanna dance, I wanna die.
And I wanna think of something witty and heartfelt to say back everytime.
But I can't, so I just freeze up and say nothing.
Portland didn't seem so far away two months ago,
but I guess having a car makes the world feel small.
Now I feel it stretching bigger and bigger everyday.
I never planned on everyone I love living so far away.
The things that I plan for rarely come true.
I laid out a framework in which to sort my life.
I can only predict that you and I are gonna be fine.
Someday I'll get myself a car.
Then I can go anywhere, see anyone, bring anything.
So I'll bring nothing but my cat and my guitar to your door.
But when I knock on it, you might not answer.
Because the things that I planned for just didn't come true.
I laid out a framework in which to force your life.
I could never predict that you and I would come untied.
We've come untied.
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3. |
The Step Dad Dance
03:29
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The most vivid memory of him never really starts at the beginning.
It's crashing and kicking in my head right at the interesting parts.
With his hands on my chest. With my back against the wall.
Man I swear my feet weren't even touching the ground.
He thought I was walking away midsentence,
I was just shifting my stance.
But it still triggered an angry, abusive Step Dad Dance.
You puff your chest out,
You push your kid down.
Make sure your voice is loud,
Make him never forget this town.
Then when that vein in his forhead was getting ready to pop
I took it as my cue to run away.
What was a kid like me to do?
Then he grabbed me by the arm harder than I've ever been grabbed before.
It was back to the dancing floor.
You puff your chest out,
You push your kid down.
Make sure your voice is loud,
Make him never forget this town.
You puff your chest out,
You push your kid down.
Make sure your voice is loud,
Make him never forget this town.
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4. |
Cliffhunting
02:17
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She said, "You-- You wouldn't stop screaming that night."
I said, "I know, mom. That's just the music that I like to write."
That's what I'll be doing for the rest of my life.
I'll be tearing these vocal cords as if out of spite.
Since I live screaming, it's only fitting that I die screaming too.
I'll drive my car a hundred miles an hour into
some guard rail above a giant ravine.
Then the only thing that will matter will be gravity.
First I'll need to buy a car.
One where I can stretch my legs out all the way.
So the next time I self destruct,
I'll have somewhere to stay.
Then I'll go driving around the country,
screaming at strangers for pay.
But that life will come to an end
when I find the perfect cliff one day.
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5. |
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I went to bed at a reasonable time last night
When I heard the record repeat five times
I knew I had a failed attempt at a normal sleep schedule
So instead I got up, got dressed, took a walk outside to clear my mind.
When I heard the record repeat five times I knew I should take a nap before class
But don't tell me I don't try, you don't know what's on my mind.
I'm the kid with messy hair at a drugstore at 3 am
walking around looking at things I don't need.
Slowly walking out, I didn't pay for anything.
So if you need me don't be afraid to look
for the kid with dirty shoes in the empty parking lot
at the failing strip mall in the middle of a starless night
And if you want to, you can come talk to me
but I can't guarantee I won't be weird or mean or that everything I say
won't be fucking condescending.
Avoid the cops, lie to your boss. No one wants you drinking beer;
you're only nineteen.
Yes I'm living in a car, no I don't need your help
Ask the store security, I'll just help myself.
I'm already dumb. I'll go deaf and blind.
I'll stare into the sun, listen to my songs,
yeah I'll listen to these songs as loud as they'll fucking go.
And I'll play this guitar until my fingers fall off.
I bet my roommates can't wait for the day.
The joke's on them, I won't stop screaming even when I'm fucking dead.
Even when I'm fucking dead.
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6. |
Hurrication
03:26
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The hurricane was over.
I used the last of my battery to listen to
"Stay Honest" with you.
I didn't know you knew all of the lyrics like me.
We danced round and bounced and laughed and screamed
like two happy children that have finally found their sense of
belonging.
And then it hit me: feels like I'm at a show again.
The images rush into my head.
The crowded room, the sweaty hugs, my smiling friends.
Brisk morning air.
My phone is still dead,
But I think the lack of the knowlege of the passage of time
helps me clear my head.
So I fill it with some of my favorite memories:
camping in Arizona, driving accross the country.
My cheeks are wet, I'm looking at the sun thinking of my favorite things.
And then it hit me: feels like I'm at a show again.
The images rush into my head.
The crowded room, the sweaty hugs, my smiling friends.
I cried tears of happiness, I miss my friends.
We will cry tears of happiness, we'll see our friends.
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Jib Haddan New Orleans, Louisiana
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